I'm a murderer

I've killed many bugs in my life. I've accidentally hit animals with my car (possum, bird, goat - don't ask). But yesterday I felt so horrible. I killed a bee.

This was a bumble bee. It was a mad one at that. I'm guessing it came when one of our doors came open and it was flying all over the house banging into stuff and buzzing very loudly. It chased the dog some and I knew I had to do something. It wanted to go out, but how do you soundly usher a bumble bee outside without getting stung? So in our best interest, I sprayed some bug spray on the bee. What followed made me feel horrible . . . .

The bee immediately got angrier and started banging into the window. Then it started turning flips all the while buzzing. And then it fell off the top of the window onto the window pane and continued turning flips and buzzing. The bee was dying right in front of me a slow and painful death. He then flipped himself on the floor and began running in circles on his back. The whole time he was buzzing but as every second passed, the buzzing got quieter and quieter. Finally, he quit buzzing and it was over. I know it was just a bee, but I don't guess I've really ever seen anything actually go from being fine to dying. Call me a softey and a wuss, but I felt horrible.

Let me try to make this spiritual. Like the bee trying to get out, many times there are dreams and visions just dying to break out of us. Little glimpses show up here and there, but if we're not careful, we'll allow the words of others to "spray" death on them. What follows is a slow painful death of a dream. One saying goes like this, "old habits die hard." I beg to differ . . . . Dreams die hard. It's painful. And I started thinking . . . all of us have played the part of the bee at one time. All of us have played the part of mean ol' murderer (me). In either case . . . if your bee is trying to get out, don't be afraid to take the risk of opening a door or a window to see what happens. Yeah, it could backfire and you get hurt or disappointed, but at least you know. And, if you're the one with the spray can in your hand . . . don't do it . . . but if you must, step on it. It's quicker and easier.